Thread:MyProjectAlicization/@comment-84.31.81.90-20150224191622/@comment-6697950-20150224224847

I've reviewed your changes and noticed several issues.


 * 1) The section is named "history", not "event summary". It was only intended to be a summary of events that took place before the beginning of the arc.
 * 2) You've made a serious error with explaining why Quinella's and Cardinal's Fluctlights began to break down. I'm not sure if you're basing it on the web version or some other source, but Tap's translation gave a completely different explanation of the event.
 * 3) You have a strange habit of using weird grammar. You name a noun, then immediately after it use pronoun to refer to a noun that's already in the sentence and is right next to the place where you add the pronoun. Not sure why you use such silly grammar when you can just use the possessive on the noun itself.
 * 4) Terms are supposed to use the Nihongo template, instead of being copy pasted from a different page.
 * 5) The Load Test Stage is already covered on another article. No need to repeat it on every article, just link the article that already covers it.
 * 6) It's = it is. And only that meaning. If you want to use it like his or hers, then it's "its" without the apostrophe.
 * 7) It's "golem", not "gollum". This is not the Lord of the Rings.